Ninety-nine percent determination, real, determination.

Most of you know by now that I have been off work since first diagnosed with cancer. The date is etched into my mind, December 2, 2006. This date is memorable for many reasons, most important of all is the date I had my first biopsy, which was for the suspected Squamous Cell Carcinoma near my left vocal chord. Also, it was the day I quit smoking, and have never looked back! Due to an extremely sore throat after the biopsy I did not go back to work, and it was while I was off, about five days later, when I got the news that I indeed had cancer

Another reason it is a vivid at this time, is because this is when I first went on S&A (sick & accident disability), this was the beginning of a nightmare that I feel could have been avoided had my employer let me go off a day earlier . The reason for wanting to go off a day earlier was twofold, firstly, it would have allowed me to be less stressed about going in for the biopsy, by letting me better prepare myself for the 6am arrival at the hospital for the day surgery. Secondly, and probably more importantly, December 1 2006 was the day my employer decided to switch insurance carriers for our S&A, LTD and Life insurance. As of December 2 2006, we were starting with a new carrier, and I was going to be the guinea pig so to speak.

Well as it turns out my concerns were warranted. You see, the policy under the new carrier stated that benefits would be paid from day one if you were admitted to a hospital or admitted for a "day surgery". Well after two weeks off and no cheque yet, I began making some serious inquires. What I was being told was that the insurance company deemed my "day surgery" a "procedure" for which they did not pay benefits from day one, and benefits would begin after 10 consecutive days off.

I was not falling for that! And so it began. I approached my union about it, and even showed them the insurance papers filled out by the surgeon which stated, "Day Surgery" and was checked off. Apparently there was another box checked as well to do with "procedure", and that was causing an issue.

I had just recently had a biopsy which determined I had cancer, I was going to have to undergo a series of 25 radiation treatments a.s.a.p! So my focus at this point was one of determination, real , determination. I went to my union hall with my case to file a grievance, I was told at the time by one of the top officials at the union hall that this was a "slam dunk" case and not to worry. Worry, yeah right, now nearing Christmas and still no cheque from the insurance company, worry was the daily theme.

Christmas and New years day both came and went, and still, no cheque! Several calls were made during those weeks, to company payroll, the union local, and the insurance company. The insurance company was still claiming I had a "procedure" when the paper work clearly indicated "Day Surgery". One little box of the form checked off in error because of the way the form was laid out, yet they knew I had "day surgery"!

By the end of the first week of January 2007, I finally had a cheque in hand. Less of course the first weeks pay that I was off. This was going to be a battle. Step two of the grievance procedure came and went with no results, and now the union local was saying I did not have a case! What! Back up the train, they told me I had a "slam dunk" case, what happened to that. Well it seems the union official I was dealing with sent a letter to the insurance company handling the claim and got a return letter basically telling him to go fly a kite, so to speak. That was where it was going to lay. I was informed it was not a strong enough case to take to arbitration based on the box that was accidentally checked of by the surgeon.

After further discussions with the union's national rep, I was informed that if I could come up with something in writing that states I had "Day Surgery", or any kind of surgery they would then look at pursuing the case. After several letters, paid for out of pocket!, the union, and in particular our National Rep. was stating those letters were not good enough, when I asked him "exactly what are you looking for", all he could come up with is "something that says I had "day surgery". Just to mention here, this was a "new" National Rep I was dealing with, just freshly moved up in the ranks to that position.

I informed him that two letters I gave him both stated I had "day surgery". Not good enough apparently, and no explanation as to why! So so far $150.00 out of pocket to try to get $500.00 they owe me. At this rate by the time I'm done there will be nothing to claim and I'll be in the hole!


Furious does not even begin to explain how I was felling, not to mention the date of my first radiation treatment was fast approaching, and there were tests to be done, masks to be made and a C/T Simulation to go through to set it all up! Stress? you betcha! However, that only made my determination stronger, and they, along with this cancer, were not going to beat me. One more doctor to see, my Family Doctor. I dropped into his office one day as I was at the drugstore picking up a prescription anyway, and just happened to ask his nurse if she could look in my file and see if there was anything in there that says I had "day surgery".


BINGO! there it was in black and white, the notes from the surgeon who did the biopsy describing step by step what he did with me from the time I entered the O.R. suite! Hooked me up to I.V., strapped my arms to the table and belted me to the table as well, administered the drugs to put me under, used this tool, that knife, this piece of equipment....etc, etc. I'll take 5 copies of that please! How much?, don't worry Tim just take it! Nice, now were cooking!

To say I was elated with this development would be an understatement. Now, I was going to "get even" with the union National Rep. No, I was not going to take this one to him, been there, done that, and it cost me! No,this time I was going piss them off by taking it straight to my employer, bypassing the union and going straight to the Labor Relations Mgr. He said he would go over it with the payroll / benefit Mgr. (his wife) and get back to me, but did not see a problem getting the weeks disability pay owed to me, as this letter was perfectly clear, I indeed did have "day surgery". No shit Sherlock!

By the time I did all the running around getting what everyone was requesting to prove my case, it was now March of 2007! Radiation, was completed, I was tired, weak, burned from the radiation and a sore nearly closed throat, and was now going to be starting Chemotherapy treatments. Chemo you say? Yep, Chemo, you see, while I was in my last weeks of radiation another "lump" popped up on my neck, which coincidentally was the main reason they even found the Squamous Cell Carcinoma, finding that was a fluke! they really were looking for the cause of the lump on my neck when they found that.

There was another surgery that took place near the end of February/07 which was another biopsy this time they got the lump and biopsied it. Low and behold, cancer number two! I was diagnosed with a T-Cell, Large B-Cell non-Hodgkin's lymphoma stage three. So all this running around for a weeks pay was taking it's toll on me with all the other stuff going on. In the end, I WON! I got my weeks pay.

Determination, real, determination, they were not going to beat me, and they didn't, I proved my point. Now, this is where some may question , why did I do all this for a weeks pay. Well my friends, and this is where some of you in the 1% should pay attention. I did not have a bankroll to fall back on. You see at that time, and prior to being diagnosed with cancer not once, but twice and two different cancers, I had been laid up with a work related injury from around Jan of 2005, and laid up on light duty till I had knee surgery in Dec 2005. I had only just gone back to work around June or July of 2006, and being laid up for a year, and on light duty in the office, not driving making my normal wage, we were put in a situation where we had to declare personal bankruptcy, and that is where I lost my RRSP savings, it was the first thing they took. It was not a large amount, but it was something.

So you see, that one weeks pay, was not only essential to us, but I was entitled to it, and they were not going to take it away, yes, we struggled a lot during that time, after all, it started just before Christmas! We still struggle to this very day. We are basically living day to day and month to month on these disability payments, and we do the best we can. Does it end here, nope it doesn't.

Once again my employer comes at me with a letter stating that they no longer have to pay my other benefits, prescription, dental, eyeglass, etc. Somehow, they came up with some kind of clause, not even in our collective agreement that stated they no longer had to pay my benefits! What! Here we go again.

After going through step one and step two of the grievance process they blatantly stated, tough luck! Well, this time I proved my case and we went to arbitration, and once again I WON!  Once again, determination, real, determination. Benefits were restored, and any prescription we purchased during the time without benefits were paid! Seems that I am such a liability these people will stop at nothing to try and derail me and get rid of me. This actually happened twice where they cut my benefits but I had won the earlier case in the normal grievance process. The order of this may be a bit out of sequence, because I'm writing from memory and not my notes which are more accurate. But the order of things here is irrelevant.

Is it finally over now, nope, not at all. You see, not only did I get stuck with an insurer, who by the way the company dropped for another insurer, 5 months after I went off, which left me stuck with them as a liability, there was also a clause in the collective agreement, which had been changed in the previous collective agreement prior to me going off, limiting LTD, (Long Term Disability) payments to a FIVE year maximum. Yep, a FIVE year maximum, again something done due to premium issues and profits. Our previous contract took you to age 65, or your return to work which ever was first. Well, unfortunately, I don't think that will be happening with me, so, come March of 2012 I will lose my Long Term Disability pension.

Losing that pension is going to be a big hit on us, and Brenda is probably going to be returning to the workforce then. Right now she's been looking over me the past 5 years. Without her going back into the workforce, we would have to try to survive on a Canada Pension Plan Disability pension. Let's just say that will not even cover our rent, let alone pay the bills. The bills by the way, are just the basics, no credit cards, no loans, no mortgages, none of that, that was all taken care of in the bankruptcy a number of years ago. So we are coming to a point where many decisions have to be made, we will get through it, as we are doing now, just remember, I have determination, real, determination to triumph over these battles!

You may see that I enter a lot of contests, well, that is how we get to have an evening out, whether it be a concert, a show, a hockey game, what ever, it gets us out, which is a luxury we would not otherwise be able to take advantage of.

So we are with the 99% in this world, and have learned to get through the tough times, something most of the 1% who control the world we live in, have never had to do! Now I'm not knocking the people who struggled to get where they are, but you know, the ones that had it handed to them, and care less about what happens to me or you or the turmoil they leave behind on their way up.

Although I may not be out there with the 99% occupying Senator David Croll park, in downtown Windsor, just outside city hall, I am there in thought and spirit, after all, I am living it day to day.

Just remember, when the next challenge, or obstacle to overcome is put in front of us, I will take it on, with determination, real, determination!

Once a Cancer Patient, always a Cancer Patient?

So, a bit has happened since my last blog post. On Tuesday October 4th I seen Dr. Gupta at the Cancer Center. Dr. G. is new here at our Cancer Center in Windsor, ON. and is currently filling in for my regular oncologist, who is on sabbatical.


Dr. Gupta graduated from Government Medical College in Amritsar, India 2003, completed her residency in internal medicine at Wayne State / Detroit  Medical Centre (DMC) and her Fellowship at Barbara Ann Karmanos Cancer Institute. She is a member of the American Society of Oncology and Hematology (ASCO), American Society of Hematology (ASH), American Association of Cancer Research (AACR) and the American Medical Association (AMA). Dr. Gupta joined the Cancer Program in 2011 and her specialty areas are breast, lung, hematology and gynecology.


She seems good at what she does. She had researched my history before I seen her and had familiarized herself with all I have been through. She also gave me a full check up, and spent time checking my abdomen, I had told her about the pains I'd been having. She said she did feel something that did not seem right but, she stated that there was nothing showing in the C/T, ultrasound, or x-rays that I had done two weeks prior.

I also informed her that I would be seeing Dr. Peer, an internist later that same day. I have to say, I was impressed with the time she spent with me.  When I asked if she was here to stay, she stated that she would be here for a least a year, and then take it from there.She had even called me back the next day with an answer to a question I had asked at my appointment.

Later that same day, the 4th of Oct. I seen Dr. Peer. in the afternoon. Again another appointment I was impressed with. Dr. Peer, also was very pleasant and took the time to listen to my concerns. We sat down in his office for a consultation first, followed by a full exam, and then back in his office to discuss things. After I brought him up to speed on my history, he said that he would like to have me in for the colonoscopy A.S.A.P. and to see his booking secretary to book the procedure.

The booking secretary stated she had an opening for this coming Tuesday October 11th, but with it being Thanksgiving weekend here, she did not want me not enjoying the festivities, so she booked me for Friday the 7th October, which meant I had to start the prep immediately! So having had a bowl of cereal and a coffee and donut in between appointments, that was going to be it, nothing more to eat until after the procedure on Friday. She then gave me a prescription for Pico-Salax to get the ball rolling so to speak.

Oh what a joy the next three days were, besides the fact of nothing but fluids for those days, there were of course were the other effects that go along with the "clean out" process. Friday could not come fast enough. From the time I started taking the Pico-Salax Wednesday afternoon, the parade was on from my perch here in front of my laptop, to my throne in the other part of the apartment. I think I wore a path in the carpeting!

Finally, Friday the day of my procedure was here! Brenda had me at Windsor Regional Hospital Met Campus for 8:00am. My appointment was for 8:30am and I was told to check into admitting for 8:15am. After getting checked into admitting we headed down to the Endoscopy area on the lower level and got checked in there. After about a half hour wait, I was called to the window and given a questionnaire/history paper to fill out and consent form to sign.

I was about another twenty minutes or so before I was finally called in. Once in the wait/recovery room I changed into one of those wonderful hospital gowns and hooked up to an IV. Of course once all that was done and I laid there for about five minutes, I had to go! Couldn't have happened before I was all hooked up and had to drag a pole into the washroom with me. Once back on the gurney, it was about another twenty minutes or so before the nurse finally come and wheeled me into the procedure room. A shot of conscious sedation and the procedure was under way.

I did mange to watch most of the procedure on the monitor. We were not far into the procedure when there it was, a dreaded polyp! The damn thing looked huge on the monitor, but of course it was magnified, and when I spoke with the nurse later back in the recovery room, she stated it was "just a tiny one", but would still be sent away for pathology. No mention, nor do I remember much more from during the procedure, about what might be causing my abdominal pain. Just some paper work about polyps and told to call Dr. Peer for a follow-up to go over the outcome of the procedure with him in three weeks.

First things first, as soon as we got to the hospital lobby, it was straight to the Tim Horton's counter for a coffee! Ahhhh, now we're talking.  I was so dry I was spittin' sawdust. From there we headed home, and soon as I got settled back at home, it was time for a bowl of Multi-Grain Cheerios! Food once again!

To go back a bit, to while I was waiting, one of the nurses from the chemo suite at the Cancer Center walked by and said hello, and sorry to see me there, jokingly of course, referring to being in the Endoscopy waiting room, then, once I was inside and being wheeled into the procedure room, another familiar nurse from Four West, Oncology unit said hello. I guess she's working down in Endoscopy now. Once I was in the procedure room, I had heard her say to one of the other nurses out in the hallway, "Tim is one of my old oncology patients from when I was on Four West".

That brought me to pondering a thought as I was writing this post today, is it really true?, Once a cancer patient, always a cancer patient? I believe that may be true of most cancer patients, from talking with survivors and patients alike, I've found that most agree that there really isn't a day that goes by that you don't think about, all the tests, results, what's next, or worrying about every little ache and pain and wondering, is "it" back?

Speaking for myself, I don't think there is a day that goes by that I don't think about "it" either. The little or big pains, the tests, the Dr. visits. It all adds up to always being just that, a cancer patient. Of course for me that is true anyway, I am currently still a cancer patient, doing the watch and wait thing, but I speak of others out there, that have discussed the issue with me of always being a cancer patient, the worries about "it" being back.

So today, I put that all aside, or at least try to fool myself I did, and save that for another day. Brenda and I, along with her mom and brother will be celebrating Thanksgiving, and giving thanks for our lives, and all that is a part of them. So from our table to yours, I wish you all a very happy Thanksgiving, enjoy.